That's what my 4 year old has been telling me all day. Apparently reprimanding him is grounds for time in the clinker.
"Nathan, quit hitting your brother."
"It was an accident."
"I just saw you do it son, it wasn't an accident."
"It was an accident, and if you keep saying that to me,
YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL."
"How about you go to jail since you're the one who commited assault and battery?"
"NO! YOUR'RE GOING TO JAIL!"
At this point I'm wondering, have I fed him today? Did he sleep well last night? Is there a full moon? Body snatchers?
So I walk away thinking the child is beyond reasoning and I will wait a few minutes to address the situation again. When lo and behold, another innocent victim of Nathan rage. Okay, Logan is never that innocent since it is his sworn duty in life to irritate his little brother, but hitting is hitting.
So I grab the little gremlim. No food or water for you after midnight you little hatchling!
"Nathan, you need to stand in the corner."
"No!"
"Turn around and face the corner."
"No. It was an accident."
(Even Osha would start to be suspicious about the recent cluster of "accidents" surrounding this 4 year old.)
"Son, turn around. I'd rather you choose to cooperate than I force you to turn."
"Stop telling me that. YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL!"
Right now I'm thinking jail isn't so bad. The toilet may be in the open, but I won't have 3 inaccurate boys using it. 3 square meals that I don't have to make. Library access, cable, and a gym to work out in. Is this jail or a country club?
The rest of the incident is sealed as it took some physical persuasion on the rear-end to convince him that facing the corner was a good idea.
(All those of you who think spanking is a crime... re-read my sentence, I never used the word, nor does this sentence insinuate that I meant to use it.)(Should've been a lawyer.)
Since that moment in the corner. I've been told on 6 different occassions that I'M GOING TO JAIL. Someone get that kid a snack and a nap.
I wonder if the jail allows conjugal visits?
Choosing Joy
6 years ago
5 comments:
My favorite part--you won't have boys missing the toilet target--it makes me want to go to jail too.
that's pretty funny...
Has he been watching cops? Or any authority shows? lol that is awesome! You should get handcuffs and put him in them then stick him in the corner. hehehe
This made me really happy! Good stuff from my girl Jo.
You are so funny. I can so relate. My 3 year old has the same issues and you have me thinking, jail might be a good vacation. I totally understand the boys and the toilet too. They need a special school for boys, young and old, to teach them how to hit the INSIDE of the bowl!
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